I Just Got Engaged! What Should I Do First?

You got engaged. 🎉
Your phone is buzzing. Your ring finger is extra sparkly. Everyone suddenly wants to know “Have you picked a date yet?”

Deep breath.

Before you open Pinterest, Google “average wedding cost,” or accidentally book a venue at midnight, here’s what you actually should do first.

1. Relax. (Seriously.) Enjoy Being Engaged.

The very first thing you should do after getting engaged is… nothing.

Enjoy this phase. Call each other fiancé for a bit. Let it sink in. This chapter moves fast, and once planning starts, life can start feeling overwhelming real quick.

You have the rest of your lives together. You don’t need to rush into spreadsheets and timelines just yet. This moment deserves to be savored.

(Wedding planning will still be there next week. Promise.)

2. Talk About How You Want to Get Married (Not the Details Yet)

When you’re ready to start planning, step one is not venues or colors or centerpieces.

Step one is a conversation.

Sit down together and talk about how you want to celebrate your marriage and not what Instagram says a wedding should look like.

Ask questions like:

• Do we want something big or intimate?

• Are we homebodies or adventure people?

• Do we want a traditional wedding, a destination wedding, an elopement, or something in between?

• What moments matter most to us?

This conversation helps determine whether you’re planning:

• A large wedding

• A small wedding

• A destination wedding

• An elopement

• Or a totally non-traditional celebration

There is no “right” answer, only what feels right for you.

3. Build Your Guest List Early (Yes, Really)

We know, this isn’t the fun part. But it is one of the most important steps in wedding planning.

Before you look at venues, Pinterest boards, or vendor pricing, you should have a realistic guest count.

Why?
Because your guest list directly impacts:

• Venue options

• Budget

• Catering costs

• Staffing needs

• Overall vibe of the day

You don’t need final RSVPs yet but having a solid estimate (even a range) will save you from falling in love with spaces that simply won’t work.

Future you will be grateful.

4. Then (and Only Then) Start Looking at Venues & Inspiration

Once you know:

• The type of wedding you want

• Your approximate guest count

Now you can start exploring:

• Wedding venues

• Pinterest inspiration

• “How to plan your wedding” articles

• Instagram saves and mood boards

At this point, inspiration becomes a tool and not a trap.

You’ll be filtering ideas through your priorities, instead of trying to force your wedding into someone else’s aesthetic.

5. Figure Out a Starting Budget (It’s Okay If It’s a Guess)

Next up: money talk.

You don’t need a perfect budget but you do need a starting point. Talk about:

• How much you’re comfortable spending

• Whether family is contributing

• What matters most to you (experience, food, photos, design, etc.)
  
  

If you’re unsure where to start, using a wedding budget worksheet can help you estimate realistic numbers and avoid surprises later.

Budget clarity = less stress + better decisions.

6. Start Touring Venues That Match Your Reality

Once you’ve aligned on:

• Vision

• Guest count
  Budget range

You’re ready to start touring venues that actually make sense for your wedding and not just the ones that look good online.

Look for spaces that align with:

• Your guest count

• Your priorities

• Your budget

• Your overall vibe

This is where wedding planning starts to feel exciting instead of overwhelming.

Final Thought: There’s No “Perfect” Order. Just a Smart One.

Wedding planning doesn’t need to be chaotic. When you start with intention instead of impulse, everything else falls into place more smoothly.

And if you ever feel stuck, overwhelmed, or unsure what step comes next text us. That’s exactly where a wedding planner or coordinator can help guide the process without taking over your vision.

You’ve got this.
And you don’t have to do it alone.